Cul-de-sac

Scattered and shattered

The pieces so widely dispersed

There is no putting back together again-

Not even the king’s horses nor any of his men

Have the glue time or patience

To make me whole again…

So I just sit here and stare

I stare at the sky, the clouds, the stars

The night, the day, the moon, the sun

Just to avoid my reflection

That which reflects who I am

Shows me that which I do not wish to see.

That the years and the word have taken their toll

And I no longer recognise the stranger I have become

…so I face the wall, the dead end, the cul-de-sac

Like a child being punished for deeds misdone

And I wander; what do I do now? Where do I go now?

I can no more outrun a wolf/panther/jaguar

Than I can my own shadow

And so I look up and at the wall

Anywhere and everywhere, except where I should

Because the world I have imagined and created

Is much better than the reality I daily face

So like a coward I cower

Because giving up is easy

And it is just too much

To ask me to be brave

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